| | APPARENTLY i don't update enough... or so a few people have mentioned....
interesting thing, is that not many people seem to read this anymore,
and so blogging doesn't quite feel like a good use of my time. or
maybe blogging didn't feel like a good use of my time and i stopped and
nobody read it because there was nothing to read?? vicious cycle,
eh??
so, i'll try to keep it up better, and perhaps some good will come of it.
for starters, i lost my job July 21st. through (mostly) no fault
of my own. i had had issues with the administrator since i
started, but being the professional i am was able to work despite them,
and be successful. however, right around my birthday they told me that
our admin. was beign transferred to another community! my first
thought, "hooray! thank you, Lord, for fixing the problem and making my
job more enjoyable!" THEN they announced that the new admin.
would be our current Nurse. "OH NO!! she hates me!"
so... i leave for a long weekend, and come back on a tuesday.
That day, something felt SO wrong to me there. i'd been unhappy
in the job almost since i started, i didn't think the company was a
very ethical one, and i didn't enjoy the many times they tried to get
me to lie on something, so the results would come out favorably.
so, that day, i called my mom and talked to her about my finding a new
job, and asked her if she would help out some, and she said of
course. then i went inside and while waiting for our new admin.
to do a few things i'd been asking the old one to do for weeks, i
played online and looked at new job ad's. (they made me stay
in-office, and since i travel to work, i had nothing else to do...) and
then a few hours later they come in and tell me that, "it just won't
work out" i replied, "ok. i expected not, and i'm happy with that
idea" and they discussed another property with me, but to their total
shock i said i didn't want to work for them, and then i left! i
think they expected a fuss or something, but i had already known.
i was so blessed that God allowed me to understand beforehand that
things were going down in a bad way, because then i was able to prepare
myself, and be calm and Christian about it. if it had come as a
surprise to me, i'm sure i wouldn't have been very nice about it.
i've been looking for a job, but i'm taking time and beign
cautious. this last job, i took because it was the first one
offered that looked decent, and it paid VERY well. now, im trying
to make sure that i pray about it first, and take a job that i will be
very happy in, and know that i belong there. i know it may take
some time, but God will keep me afloat till then, and it will all work
out for the very best. one of my favorite scriptures, Jeremiah
29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans
to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a
future" runs through my mind about a hundred times a day
lately. and i am comforted.
i spent the day with my best friend and her new son the other
day!! what a miracle new life is!! i am so excited for her, and i
am starting to get anxious to start my own family.. BUT, all in good
time!! i'm nowhere near ready yet, i know that, and so for a long
while i will live vicariously through Melynda and her son, Jordan
 the point of this way, though, not to toot the horn on
babies (well, maybe a little...) but to talk of the amazing way that
our Lord works. she and her husband have known each other since grade
school, and dated for almost 4 years before they got married, both of
them finishing school first, and she started grad-school (majoring in
Psych. and Religion!) then, about 2 months into her marriage, she
calls me and says shes a month pregnant! (they had opted against birth
control, after MUCH research and meeting with like half a dozen Dr.'s
they still couldn't prove that the pills didn't in essence cause
miscarriages but thats another days tale...). anyway, i
digress... my newly married friend had a son, and when he was
born, she heard him cry once before they whisked him away to the
NICU. she will not hear her son cry again, because he has a
condition which causes his lower jaw to be recessed and that combined
with a large cleft palate, makes it VERY difficult for him to
breatheon his own. they had to put in a trach tube a few days
later, as well as a feeding tube. Jordan is 3 months old now, and
we spent the other day in the ER bc his feeding tube had come
out. for the first time since the baby, i spent a whole day with
my best friend, and came out so much wiser. Jordan has to be fed
every 2 hours (4 is normal) through a tube, and it takes 30 minutes a
feeding(10-15 is normal). he has to be suctioned several times an
hour, as often as every 10-15 minutes sometimes, and this requires the
toting around of a machien about the sixe of a diaper bag! as
well as hooking him up to several different monitors when he sleeps,
cleaning the wound areas a few times a day, changin trach's and etc etc
many things i didn't completely understand. shes gotat least triple the
work load of a new baby, he house is overflowing with med. supplies,
she cant leave him with anyone who isn't specially trained, and so she
can't go back to school, work or anything. they're both emotionally and
physically drained. and yet, she is joyful. not once has she or
will she ever say, "why me, Lord?" she is the most patient,
understanding, compassionate and practical women i know. she is happy
with her situation, and wouldn't trade it for anything. she knows that
she was made for this, prepared for this, and that God CHOSE her to
give Jordan the special care and love he needs. and it made me
think, how many people are comfortable with their hardships? am
i? if the Lord gave me something like that to handle, could i do
it? i know that the Lord will never lay on us more than He knows
we can handle, but do i have that same faith in myself? do
you?
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| | Posted 8/5/2005 11:31 AM - 11 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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